Tuesday, March 30, 2010


 It may be not be a classy job of all, But ..to gain experience and bulding up confidence, I think this could be a pre-training.  To be honest it ain't easy, at all! Especially when u have to sell em door to door! went up and down the stairs really enhance my backpain that i already had few days back.

To knock the door and bagi salam to every room with the same voice.. could caused sorethroat and yet, to pursuade em to buy the dogs with the same dialogue.. I must be a tape-recorder! and plus, to carry all the hotdogs with ur shoulder (it's like a bag that u put on the neck or shoulder) must be whacky! plus yesterday was raining..not to mention, HEAVILY :( sigh.. Thats what Erin and I did Smlm, another :( pleaseee...

The hotdogs were all wet and we had to wipe em off and forgot pulak! we had to bagi flyers too! my gosh..can u imagine a person carry and do all those things! I can..sbb kna buat kan. tp best jugee sbb we managed to sell a lot! and make lotsa Ringgit for the boss and co. we got compliments too! yeehoo! nasibaik sell in UKM je..if not i can die mehh! we menjual at our 1st target iaitu, pendeta zaba college :) kolej Zaba is like China.. big in size and population ^^.. sila penetrate..like now!

Yesterday was my very 1st day and 1st time of direct selling. Hope today would be much much better.. and easier! 3 days more to go~~dewhsdewh..btw, thanks to all customer especially for the smile. my tiredness was consuming up by the smile and good treatment they gave. so the lesson here, (for me) jgn masam2 and cakap kasar2 with org ketuk pintu untuk jual. they wont harm, they just wanna sell :)

another signing off from HNL!

Sunday, March 28, 2010


Lately my heart's pounding and lying.. I wonder why oh why.. it ain't lying..but it just keep denying.
I wish it is not true..but yeah it does..I miss you..and again it's a taboo

We are so outta reach. all left here are memories.. I wonder if you still regconize me.. I hope this feeling is temporary

why suddenly it appears again.. after years and years of misfortune story
ego ego, please do win this.. Pride is only my ultimate trader to this..
I wish I could label it ..I hope I could depend on it

sigh oh sigh..why oh why..
time oh time..can't I just pause and rewind?

I am not confuse, am abused by my un-static heart.
i just wish that I could sense you with my ears. or use my sense to sniff your presence 
or my eye sight to know you're standing there, or taste your favourite food again?


thats all folks!

even sounds very unfinish.. thats all because of my main idea is to put some suspense flavour in it :)

naahh..i just hafta sleep early. tomorrow is not another same routine.
at least slightly diff :)

going to low yat with mama and abg.
spend spend time with both of em.
love love today and tomorrow :)
heart still not fully-rocovered.

Syifa' means penawar. But I can't even heal me. dewhdewhs

HeartNeverLies's signing off!

The perfect image of  resting. Relax, lay down and smile.

Have a great weekends though!


P.S- I admit that i ve no sense of colour and very disorganize..especially when it comes to writing. can judge by the allignment. it's like EVERYWHERE! heehoohheehhoo!!

Friday, March 26, 2010


Okie, siang td I went to career fair hosted by JobMsia at Cyberjaya. It was really useful and helpful especially for 3rd year studenista and job-seeker. yang menariknya, Matahari hari ini sangat hebat memancarkan cahayanya menembusi my skin lantas menjadikan i cacing kepanasan dan kelenjar peluh mula mengeluarkan air masin Niagara Falls dari epidermis i. Now I know..cari kerja ain't easy.dah la pki heels okie! azab yg amat! LESSON NO 1 :)


Our PM also there to launch the event. But I didn't join the launching, I had some job-hunting to do. Yes mission must comes 1st! So masa tgh jalan2 tu adalah beberapa company yang telah menarik hati. So i registered for MAS as management trainee, GCH for management trainee which the salary is quiet attractive, FELDA for management trainee (the place where i met my old fren back in matrix, doing his intership there..hope he could help me though) wink wink and the last one was SCICOM as management trainee. I prefer to be trained before start working. from the very based to the very max ala-ala camtu. and and  I believe in that :)  LESSON NO 2.

Kemudian...Fiza and I berjalan-jalan lagi..kami ke seluruh tempat even dah round yg kedua just to ensure we didn't miss great oppurtunity :) suddenly we were approached by a very tall pan-asian looking guy from ministry of security @ MOS..i was like okie!!!i mean in cooler version but in uncencored version mcm..bapaaakk laahhh!!!

He said they don't have booth because he is the one yg akan choose the right person yg qualified for the interview on tomorrow and saturday, i was like again, yay!That's why he kept wandering around the place. he gave his biz card and start blah-ing...pause and..

I was being cheesy and  asked him, Mr. what is the specific requirement for the recruitment? he replied in a very curteous way ************  [confidential]. Afterall, This job is quiet interesting and a bit challenging because as a female working in a security force for VVIP is quiet a taboo (for malay culture)  and risky. But at the same time it  would be a great platform in order to get more exposure  in corporate world. As it always been my dream to get involved in this dirty biznes baby! but yeaah..mamito mesti akan geleng2 kepala and saying no no..carik kerja lain adek..as usual me: okie dokie mami. hangat2 tahi je saya nie ^.^

Then after clock stops at 430 we all ready to hop in the bus and ride home ke mana lagi..UKM destinasi ku la..amat letih i tell you okie! but really worth it. I get to know more about job selection and just consider this as a pre-interview for me. 

for more info log on to jobmsia.gov.my


Tomorrow's To-do list:
1) continue thesis
2) replacement class
3)swimming if cuaca baik
3)go back to gombak!

gotta hit the sackoo!

HNL's signing off [click]

caption: My imagination while writing this entry. very exaggeratting btul!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010


Feeling full doesn't necessarily make u happy actually. I just finished stuffing food into my stomach but still I don't feel anything. Different than usual cause food has always been my fav subject of all! hurggh..again, I feel it, the sense of fear conquering every inch of my heart.*gulp*

I woke up this morning (sadly I don't feel like P.diddy) *sambung* with worries and gloominess. Counting the remaining days of me being here,as a UKM student. I may not be the perfect nerd-ish one but I think I did okay, overall.. yeah my performance macam acceptable juge lah , okie x malu for rating diri sendiri :D  Suddenly I kinda miss the atmosphere, the friends, the class, the fac, the ups and downs,  the trips, the fun, the sad, the fall and rise, the gossips, when i walk to the class with my fav baju kurung yang dah buruk, when I received a msg from friends asking 'where are you? kelas dah nak start" or "datang tak kelas?" .......my gosh! I love UKM. I love being a student! now I believe and apply the word *we will appreciate great things when it's gone* .dewhh

Now only 2 weeks left, and then I ll meet finals..and and whats next? UKM will set me free! apa nak buat, I can't hold that student title forever kan? I have to be independent. meet real people in  the real world. real people is nothing similar to the world I'm in right now. here are some of my view of real world @ people: Some's nice. some's mean, some's predictable, some's moody, some's judgemental, some's materialistic, some's cocky,some's optimistic, some's pessimistic, some likes us, some hates us and mcm2 some lagi! (just to make sure it rhymes!)

Being mere strong is not enough. We have to keep our mind open. If people tackles your leg and makes you fall on the ground, rise back with no regrets. laugh it off and start over but with new sheet of chapter :) Life is great, we got company, we are never alone, we have God to believe in, we have faith our family put in us, we have friends to lean on, we have money to spend, we have food to eat, we have water to drink and doing laundry, we have book to read, we have words to spell, we have phone to call, we have bus to ride and KL sentral to transit (WTF) & we have everything that we don't even know its existence!

It just the matter of time. clock is ticking, I'm still here, bila thesis nak bergerak ni wahai syifa'? tepuk dada tanya selera.

why am 1 so lazy? it's not even a question, it's a statement.
keep up seems the hardest part in my jungle of life right now.
pressure is okay, it makes/keeps me awake

Ya Almighty, help me through this journey.. lend me some strenght and smoothen my journey. Amin~

he grows beard,
why am 1 so weird,
is it because u've been fired?,
oh no! maybe because I'm tired.

UKM, dengan ini I ll be missing you ! eventhough I am not ready yet..but syifa! please grow up..tolonglah, tapi tang suara cheq tak taw nak wat lagu mana..so shut up!haha

actually there's a lot more to discard from my brain to this tiny pony blog.. but time is money man! gotta catch up with my nap-time  before going back to Gombak :) yes, Officially I have a place called home again! see you mamito and abg!

HNL's signing off!

P.S-I miss u Muizz zainuddin! balik copat skit..ponat den tggu ni aaa

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

They hate Our country

Am very laissez faire when it comes to writing.. I jot down whatever I feel and what I think even not entirely.
I feel like this time I need to voice out my thoughts especially about those who hated Malaysia. Gosh! They even have fan page on facebook for hating Malaysia. Which is damn sad. Glad I found out before it's too late. (plus I only own one citizenship) if you get what I mean.. ye, tolonglah phm!

It becomes more sad  'apabila melihatkan anak muda yg sepatutnya menjadi pelapis just know how to have fun @ ghairah berparti and live life like a hollywood star while other country moves beyond us rapidly'  kalau slowly tu tak apa juga. I know right, syifa started nagging. dewhh.. But sgt suprise bila fan page yg benci Malaysia ni berani make that page visible @ public so everyone can join. Can u tell how many people have joined that? more than 400,000 okieeeeeeee!!! I believe it will grow more and more..yes and I speak fact too ^.^.^

I wont mention which citizen created that f-ing fan page cuz I can still think rationally. Even anger has spread all over me, but mantain lah kan. 'Islam cakap sabar separuh daripada Iman and Org yg tahan marah adalah org yg kuat'. I suggest Malaysia kena ubah dasar for X-generation (including me) not just focus on developing social skills or copying other brand to excel je.. But Pertahanan is the IT thing. Itu penting.

National service je x cukup. There's a lot more to nurture inside and beneath us.  Strengthen our nation security, aware of outside world instead of goofing around  and focus on development secara keseluruhannya.  invest more money for human-development instead of physical investment aje

Tgklah kita kat mana skarang compare to the WORLD:

 Frontpage of our nation paper bertajuk patutkah artis dijadikan ikon? while other country is busy with their economics remedial programs headlines. Isn't that a shame? my gosh! malu gile kot! 

we need to move on or we will perish by globalisation and liberalisation! (as in metaphore)

Wednesday, March 17, 2010


Tajuk tu sebenarnye hanyelah rekaan semate2 dan lebih kepade rumusan ape yg hendak saye ceritekan:

Hari ini mcm biasa lepas kelas, selepas bye bye ella dan yna sbg tanda perpisahan kelas..saya akan jalan-jalan cari makan . Tadi dalam kelas sakit perot pulak (perlu kah nak cerita, perlu!) membuatkan saye lack of focus. tapi tak pe..saye akan topup ape yg saye tertinggal semasa hilang fokus tadi dengan membace (sah2 tipu)

Hari ini juge saye berharap luke di hati ini tidak berdarah balik (chewah2) sbb  smlm saye dah cukup gloomy woomy dah. yg pelik smlm saye x nangis. maybe kelenjar air mate telah berkarat kot..hehhe.. tp saye byk blame diri sendiri dan ketawe sorg2 (tp saye masih waras)

Actually, Saye sedey sbb saye pergi interview smlm. Saye rase saye telah memalukan diri sendiri, bukan sahaja saye tidak dapat amaze 3 interviewers dlm tu (2 malays + 1 italian) malah as the interviewee prestasi saye sgt ...okie, tak mo rate diri sendiri. saye telah bercakap terlalu pantas, soalan senang tp saye boleh lupe jwpn die, saye lupe nak tukar kasut yg saye bekal dlm plastic beg kuning and end up pakai sandle, hp berbunyi twice! dah la lagu drake, forever mine tu, saye terlalu honest bile mereka bertanye mengenai minat saye and and and ini adelah my very 1st time to go for a formal interview like this.
:: maybe 1 st timer kot.. (saye asyik ckp mcm nie sbb saye nak pujuk diri saye yg terlalu frust dgn diri sendiri)

Mcm2 buku (okie fine, majalah!) dah saye baca utk menghilangkan renggangan2 di hati, urat kepala leher dan senak di perut  namun HEART NEVER LIES. membuatkan saye masih teringat kejadian smlm dan ia masih cantik berbekas di hati saye. Walaupun interviewer itu ada memberi pujian (sket je!) namun ia tidak dapat OFFSET @ pampas ape yg saye mess-up. 

Pesanan umum-kalau nak pergi interview jgn pki sandle, pki kasut trus, jgn lupe fakta2 yg simple hanya kerana anda da knal SPSS tu ape, jgn ckp laju sgt, NEVER LET YOUR NERVOUSNESS SHOWS dan ape yg penting your personality. Let it shine okie!

Before menamatkan bebelan panjang ini, ada satu quote yang telah menjadi plaster kepada hati saye yang smlm pendarahannye x nak berhenti.. iaitu . . .

setiap kali anda berasa tertekan, tarik nafas sedalamnya dan katakan pada diri ala2 monologue:

"Hidup adalah perjalanan untuk anda nikmati kembaranya pada setiap langkah anda"

maksudnye: Hidup ibarat Makan. Sometimes food could tastes so delicious.. it suits your appetite.. etc but somehow in the middle of nowhere, the chef forgot to include the secret recipe in it, and the food isn't yummie as it used to be. But as an eater we have to enjoy every bit of the bite. sbb rugi lah duit keluar tp x enjoy kan. -Syifa U. aziz, 2010

Sebenarnye having blog bukan semate2 untuk sharing thoughts or story or bragging (hahah) but sebenarnya ia untuk kite excersize our right brain iaitu slot kreatif brain anda. kita akan menyedari kepentingannya setelah kita menjangkau usia 50 tahun ke ats. physically and mentally fit! isn't that hot? ahuh!

last but not least, live a happy life to be healthy! (awet mude as a bonus) at least young at heart pun okie juga.. cheerio!~

Tuesday, March 16, 2010


I have a cookie heart when I feel happy, But when I am not.. maybe something more like err salad with no toppings..hihi

Today was quiet a big day for me. But I've lost my cool and I blew off that chance. Even IT is not my ultimate desire, But I'd be happy enough if  I could amaze them with 'playing more words'. I need more practice. At least I've tried instead of chicken-out. Even the result may not be pretty
(actually never end something with A negative statement, I broke the code of etiquette!) :D

Maybe-Beneficial Trivia (s):

1. Kekurangan cahaya merupakan sebab kenapa 8 million wanita hilang mood.

Explaination: Brain needs light to produce happy feelings from serotonin. So girls (and yeah me) go soak up the sun! (okok boys too!)

and and listen to this one all u caffein consumers!-

2. Pengambilan kafein akan memberi kesan cepat kepada tubuh anda, which takes about few minutes only, so if u take more than 250 (mg) caffein in 2 hours, your body will actively produce stress hormone which eventually will accelerate your heart beat and enhance your blood pressure yang akan menyebabkan anda tidak boleh tidur malam

Tips: kawal pengambilan after 3 PM

On My Defence, it's okay to have caffein in our daily menu. Just don't double-up the (mg).

Somehow, when your heart beats faster than the usual, it gives u a feeling such as..yup, excited! now.. that's FUN!

am still not okay, not in the mood of picking up phone nor talking :(

lousy day, lousy day,
please go go away

maybe a cup of coffee/expresso will do :)

Sunday, March 14, 2010


I'm gonna prezie-hunting with my dear friend, Aja @ Midvalley today :) actually it's for her lil sis's bday. Since I don't own a sis, so I just accompany my friend and assist her on choosing which is which. 

and and .. I already watch Alice In Wonderland . I do wonder why I never had that kind of fantasy. I could've be a billionaire for now, it was amazing. Go alice! (go watch it in 3d, worth watching, lotsa colourful scenes! !


I don't know how to elaborate this. But my current feeling has been in this position for quiet some time. I'm not good at guessing. Sometimes what I thought will happen, will never happen. And sometimes might.. But it just happen once in a blue moon. Couldn't agree more if some people say that I own a weak instinct. Everything is unreacheable. My thoughts, My plan, My dreams, Hopes and Fears. When they collide, I thought they will unite as one,  But I never thought of something else. Fate Or Plan. A Riddle I can't solve.

Thursday, March 11, 2010





Wednesday, March 10, 2010


They are usually someone at your back (got ur back)

Learn to accept others' faults? okay, I used to second that during my primary and secondary but now in tertiary..I shall say, If  you really- really can't put up with others' faults or weaknesses and it affects Your dear life..better take 100 metres away from that particular person.

They are two types of friends. First with one-faced and the other one, is something more like Joker. They got both sides of nice and the face of the devil. The problem is when this Joker started to spread their negativities to others. (Sungguh melemaskan jika ini berlaku)

Another traits of Joker is they tend to focus on others' weakness..explaination for that..Personally i think they just hate people do the same thing to them. which is, people tend to focus on their faults. So to cover the lacking, they find something negative about others and spread the germs and always carik more squad to support em because they just can't simply walk alone. Maybe they just Lack of confidence and afraid of being alone.

THE ADVICE-stop being nosy and sad fact about Joker is people tend to hate em eventually and yes negativities dominating most of their brain cells..ish ish ish :)


Once in awhile I need Extreme Mocha beloved :) comforting and make me taste its coldness in a warm gentle way.. sweet but slightly bitter.. milky but chocolatey and perfected by strong coffee essence..Taste like it, is a taste like no other. must get it at least before this saturday! yummies!

I couldn't find mocha so here is the picture of its sister, latte !
"Oreo is my past, mocha is my present and now"

Saturday, March 6, 2010


Yesterday I went to KLCC with miss mimie hanna. She is unbeliveably-fun-tastic to be with!betul! first, just like any couple will do (but we r straight) We went for a movie called NINE (was an awesome movie :) seriously guys..the dance is HIP!and yes, the cast too) yummie! okay, enough! and it was so damn cold inside the hall. I could count with my hand how many people were in there, (sangat sikit) and we were sitting in the middle pulak. kan rasa macam VVIP. end.

After finished the movie, we went san-francisco*ing and had some hazelnut coffee (me) and choc ice blended (her) and chitchating like non-stop. okie, u know when girls start to talk, they forgot where they were and thought everyone wasn't listening even the pitch kinda quiet high.and yeah the speed too..tend to get, SPEEDY! actually not every topic can turn me on like that..only the juicy ones..u know, thats what we good at. enough!after the gossip session ended we straight away went to kinokuniya for free-reading magz. teehee :D that tactic is for those who still wants -to- keep -up -but- less -money -in -the -purse. i know, u re welcome!

post moterm for semalam-
1) so great to see her, we managed to fuel up our freetime and say R.I.P to boredom :)
2) its good to finally see you (klcc) again after a long coffeellion time! (i used to go there to de-stress) and it still works.
3) it such a nice feeling to feel like you belong with someone and the place
4)kesimpulannya, yesterday was totally a therapy for me. thanks mimie the great!

       "friends are like remedy for intangible diseases..boredom, sadness, loneliness"

you name it

bearbear hugs!


Today I feel like a quiter,
I'm afraid of trying,
afraid I cannot fit in,
my biggest fear,
is the feeling of,
not belong.. isolated,
hopefully tomorrow's gonna be awesome :)
and my heart pleads.

please..oh pleasee

p.s-emo sungguh