Part of my routine, everyday, is to keep myself preoccupied.. make myself busy and stuff my days with friends and loved ones because by knowing this term '"Our character is what we do when no one is looking." I might collapsed and breakdown. I am thankful to have such a supportive and understanding people around me which never fail to keep me 'alive'. At this time, I can't never be on my own..Myself is the worse companion ever.
I never put high hope on something only for one thing, which was to see my mom woke up and to hear her voice again..that time. But I never question Allah's fate to take HIS creation,it is part of life's cycle. Redha was the only way to accept death, by pronouncing prayers ushering my princess to the other world aka Alam Barzakh. I obey Ya Almighty.
Even until today, I still feel that she was around me and waited for me to update my journey to work. For me texting her everytime I reached office,on my way home from work til i reach home, going out, everytime I felt sad, when I miss her, gossips and many other things! could someone tell me how can I hear her voice again cuz I don't want to forget her wonder-extraordinary voice when she called me.. could someone hugged me like she did..could someone comfort me like she did and could someone amused me like her jokes, could someone?
Everyday, continuously,I miss her.It hurts so bad. what would you feel when your home is the last place you wanted to be? home used to be like heaven but now it just reminds you of everything you deny to remember. Ya Allah cekalkan hambaMu ini, make me immune to this, help me through this, blessed me everyday by blessing her soul.. put her in YOUR lists of PARA SHUHADA'. Same goes to my father. I love them both and to my brother.. lets continue this until we meet mama and papa again. I love you so much. Take care and be safe alright.